Learning to Trust Myself

Trusting myself has been something that I have had to continue working on. I find that it is easy to trust myself and follow my intuition when it does not involve other people, but if trusting myself means taking an action that may disappoint someone else then I struggle. For example this could be that I do not want to go somewhere but I feel obligated to because I have promised a friend that I would. I could either trust the feeling that I have and not go, or I could abandon myself and go even though I do not want to.

Unfortunately there have been many occasions where I have gone out because of obligation, rather than doing what I wanted to do. I do not beat myself up over betraying myself because I can see the progress that I have made. I am conscious of the fact that I am not following what I would really like to do. I can feel that my actions are not sitting well with me and I know that the next step is to act on them.

Each day I remind myself:

  1. That I am enough. I can trust myself without needing validation from others. It is okay to put myself first and do what is in my heart.
  2. I need to keep promises to myself. This helps me to build trust in the fact that I will follow through on what I say. Breaking promises to myself gradually erodes my self-esteem.
  3. To be kind to myself because this is a journey and I am learning on the way. Aiming to become the best version of me, achieving the goals and dreams that I have for myself and also being the best mother that I can be to my kids.

Gaining trust in yourself is a process, there will be times that it is easier than others, but the main thing is to continue and not give up.

Published by C J Anonymous

I have started this blog to share my journey through narcissistic abuse and beyond, and to help others who may have been through similar experiences. I also wanted to share the things that have helped me to heal from codependency. As a mother it became of paramount importance to me to ensure that unconscious generational patterns were not passed down to my children. Narcissism and codependency runs through my family of origin, and whilst I have learned that I cannot change the behaviour of others, I know that I can learn and improve myself daily and show up as an example to my children. There is a wealth of information about narcissism and codependency and yet everyone has a unique story to tell. Other's that shared their stories, helped me to see that I was not alone in a toxic family, or an abusive relationship and I did not have to be the victim, I could reclaim my power and change my life around. My hope is to help others who may feel as though they are the victim, suffer from low self-esteem, or believe that someone else has power over them. It can sometimes be a small quote, or one blog post that resonates with someone and starts their healing journey.

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